A pirate and a sailor were in a bar, and they take turns telling about their adventures on the seas. The sailor notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook and an eye patch.
The sailor asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?"
The pirate replies: "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off."
"Wow!" said the sailor. "What about the hook?"
"Well," replied the pirate, "we were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand off."
"Incredible!" said the sailor. "And how did you get the eye patch?"
"A seagull-dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate.
"You lost your eye to a seagull-dropping?" the sailor asked incredulously.
"Well," said the pirate,"it was my first day with the hook..."
2 comments:
Ahoy There! I lifted this ditty from CS Kendrick at the Kos.
Yo! Ho! Ho!
Throe Ho Ho And a Bottle of Rum
Fifteen fibs kill a dead land's best
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Drink and the devil be done for the rest
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
The game was fixed for ole Cheney's stock
Ole Cheney gained; HAL's marked up lots!
Rummy's throat was parched belike
Fending reporters off all night
There they lay, fat rich men all
Break o' day in a boozing brawl
Throe Ho Ho and a bottle of rum
Fifteen fibs for a whole world's fall
Throe Ho Ho and a bottle of rum
Sow Death with lies? They've got the gall
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Ole Dubya sat reading 'bout goats
When the word came through that he'd have his prize
That War laid waste to far Iraq
And death for thousands fall from the skies
Dripped all day in up-staring eyes at
Murk sunset and at foul sur-prise
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Fifteen fibs leave `em stiff and stark
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
A nation bears the murder mark
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
`Twas a DU shell or a stream of lead or a
Yawning hole in an IED'd head
And the vultures glut with a yawning red and
There they lay aye damn my eyes
All lookouts clapped on par - a - dise all
Souls bound just con - tra - ri - wise
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Fifteen fibs, a useful few
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Every one killed quite a few
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
There were fields on fields of fine black gold
With a Ton of cash in the middle hold
And the museums riot with stuff untold as
They lay there that had took the plum
With a sightless glare and their lips struck dumb
While we shared all by the rule of thumb
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Fifteen fibs kill a dead land's best
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Drink and the devil had done for the rest
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
We wrapped `em all in 'freedom' tight with
Twice ten clubs of a slaver's might
And we heaved `em over and out of sight with a
Throe heave ho and fare you well
And a sullen plunge in a sullen swell
Ten long years deep on the road to hell
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
Throe ho ho and a bottle of rum
It's only Nero-esque if the city is burning. :)
by cskendrick on Mon Sep 19th, 2005 at 12:
A pirate and a sailor were in a bar, and they take turns telling about their adventures on the seas. The sailor notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook and an eye patch.
The sailor asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?"
The pirate replies: "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off."
"Wow!" said the sailor. "What about the hook?"
"Well," replied the pirate, "we were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand off."
"Incredible!" said the sailor. "And how did you get the eye patch?"
"A seagull-dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate.
"You lost your eye to a seagull-dropping?" the sailor asked incredulously.
"Well," said the pirate,"it was my first day with the hook..."
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