Your links for the past week or so...

First, the Ted Kennedy stuff: The play-by-play, Obama's eulogy, Ted, Jr.'s eulogy, the Big Picture, and Eugene Robinson's "A Prince's Fate" (and one more: What Teddy would do).

Then there's health care (the Huckabee plan is already in place!):

Where's the efficiency in this system?!?

And the rest...

Oh, the fakery. The faces of coal are fake. The anti-marriage Mainers are fake. Which is all very sad and pathetic. But this fake Ronald McDonald is pretty much hilarious.

Big Egg.

The Man Who Walked Around the World.

Ta-Da! The gays save marriage!!!

And finally, this is a jam-packed "New Rules" from Bill Maher, including these choice tidbits:

But, what did Obama actually say to make Karl Rove's head explode and the popcorn fly out? Well, cover your children's ears. When he was asked if he believed in American exceptionalism, he said he did the same way the Brits believe in British exceptionalism and the Greeks in Greek exceptionalism. Yes, "President John F. Kenya" actually said that people in other countries might like their countries better.

Well, I was so shocked, I nearly dropped the Bible I was using to help me masturbate into my gun.

Sarah Palin, in her farewell speech kept telling us how she's wired. You know, I'm not a doctor--or an electrician--but, I suspect this is faulty wiring, this world view that, in her words, we should never apologize for our country. Really? Never? Not for slavery? Or Japanese internment camps? Or if we tortured the wrong guy at Guantanamo Bay? The Indians?! Nothin', Sarah? "The Real Housewives of Atlanta," maybe?

I mean, shouldn't John McCain apologize for…you?

Mitt Romney's new book is called No Apology: The Case for American Greatness. You can find it at Borders in the "Suck Up" section. It's such a perfect title for today's conservative, combining paranoia with arrogance. "No one has yet asked me to apologize, but if someone ever does, f*ck them."

Filet de Huckabee

Your celebrity chef this evening is Jon Stewart. And your main course is a homophobe and his tiresome, pathetic attempt to hide behind his increasingly incoherent interpretation of the Bible, or his quickly cobbled together and rigid definition of marriage -- which has, in fact, been constantly evolving over the years. If you need a straw for your beverage, just wait a moment -- Huckabee will be grasping for one pretty soon.

Please people -- if you're really not trying to jam your religion down the throats of the rest of us, you're going to have to come up with a non-Biblical reason for us to discriminate against homosexuals. Otherwise, well... we're done and you're wrong. The biblical argument doesn't work.

(And don't get me started on procreation -- or do you think this marriage should have been prevented?)

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Mike Huckabee Pt. 2
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog The Daily Show on Facebook

Others cover the segment at Pam's House Blend and Towleroad (also here).

And check out this clip (via Joe. My. God):

But that's the URL!

(Sorry about the language.) This. Fucking. Election.

Tuesday hodge-podge

I've been reading these internets today and have a random sampling of interesting tidbits found in these here tubes:

• Hello. I'm Billy Blades. And so are you.
• Today the Iraqi government says that they want the US out of Iraq -- including our military bases. This flies in the face of all of John McCain's plans for permanent bases in Iraq and a 100-years war. What will he doooo?!?
• Speaking of John McCain, the old coot thinks that he's much more highly regarded among vets than he really is. And btw, only people who have served have the right to question McCain's judgment -- oops! Make that: only people who have served AND who also agree with John McCain! And he doesn't want to talk about being a POW -- unless it's in a freakin' campaign commercial. Seriously?
• You've probably heard that those inbred polygamists who got busted earlier this year for letting old men knock up their daughters while they're still little girls have their own clothing line. It turns out they let their daughters dress like flashy harlots.
• Remember when there were only 3 channels on TV (well, four if you were lucky enough to live in an area with a PBS station)? Have things changed all that much? Not really.
• Now here are a couple of stories that made me laugh out loud today: 1) That the man who never read a book might pretend to write one. and 2) That there are people out there who would consider it appropriate to put the same clueless moron, who can't even quote Jefferson properly, in a classroom. With children.
• And speaking of George Bush, his buddy John McCain hates bloggers. Yeah, that whole free-flowing information thing sure does put a real crimp in the old bullshit spewer, don't it?
• Those wacky internetizens are not done with Jesse Helms yet. They're questioning his patriotism, calling him irrelevant and defeated, and remembering when his house was condemed! Oh, and Mike Huckabee loved and admired him.
• Charlie "110% Heterosexual" Crist is still in the news and Chris Matthews doesn't love him.
• Are you a quilter? How about quilting for our nation's wounded heroes?
• A guy in Cleveland, TN has figured out how to run a car on Chattanooga's greatest natural resource (more here)!
• A Norwich woman spent the morning with a bat in her bra (via BoingBoing).
• Are you ready to wear a bracelet when you get on a plane? One that zaps you with a shock if you don't behave?
• Here's the latest from the awesome Improv Everywhere troupe!
• Worst. President. Ever.
• six-course lunch and 18-course dinner?!? Sheesh!

NC, IN

Oh, please, let this be the night that puts us all out of our misery.

UPDATE: Clinton has cancelled all public events for tomorrow (except for a fundraiser tomorrow night). The results from Lake County look like they might be enough for Obama to take the lead from her in Indiana. It's almost 1 am and we're still waiting...

UPDATE: AT 1:09am, MSNBC declared Clinton the winner in an Indiana squeaker.

UPDATE: good summary coverage from towleroad.

	Democrat (%, #votes, delegates)					Republican (%, #votes, delegates)
Tuesday May 6	North Carolina
		Obama	56%	890,695	(58)		McCain	73%	381,138	(0)
		Clinton	42%	657,920	(42)		Huckabee	12%	62,917	(0)
		(margin		232,775)			Paul	8%	40,275	(0)
	Indiana
		Clinton	51%	638,274	(37)		McCain	77%	317,837	(0)
		Obama	49%	615,862	(33)		Huckabee	10%	40,018	(0)
		(margin		22,412)			Paul	8%	31,481	(0)
	99% reporting

Upcoming:
May 13: West Virginia
May 20: Kentucky and Oregon
June 1: Puerto Rico
June 3: South Dakota and Montana

At Last, PA!

The dog had some minor surgery today, but she's back home and feeling fine. While she convalesces, we'll be following the returns from Pennsylvania...

UPDATE: just an aside: I've been watching the coverage all evening, and have noticed that both candidates have played John Mellencamp songs. But interestingly, Mellencamp himself (along with his wife) appeared on stage with Obama in Indiana this evening. Will the campaign music issue resurface?

	Democrat (%, #votes, delegates)					Republican (%, #votes, delegates)
Tuesday April 22	Pennsylvania
	Clinton	55%	1,260,444	(83)		McCain	73%	587,210	(0)
	Obama	45%	1,046,220	(73)		Paul	16%	128,483	(0)
						Huckabee	11%	91,430	(0)
100% reporting

Next up:
May 3: Guam
May 6: North Carolina and Indiana
May 13: West Virginia
May 20: Kentucky and Oregon
June 1: Puerto Rico
June 3: South Dakota and Montana

(Our long national nightmare continues ad nauseum...)

MS! (Yeah -- Another One!)

	Democrat (delegates)				Republican (delegates)
Tuesday March 11	Mississippi
	Obama	61%	(19)		McCain	79%	(36)
	Clinton	37%	(14)		Huckabee	12%	(0)

VT, OH, RI, TX!

I'm way behind on my reading (more on why later in the week), so for now, all I have is results...

UPDATE: Buh-bye, Huckabee!

	Democrat (delegates)				Republican (delegates)
Tuesday March 4	Vermont
	Obama	59%	(9)		McCain	72%	(17)
	Clinton	39%	(6)		Huckabee	14%	(0)
Ohio
	Clinton	54%	(71)		McCain	60%	(79)
	Obama	44%	(59)		Huckabee	31%	(0)
Rhode Island
	Clinton	58%	(13)		McCain	65%	(13)
	Obama	40%	(8)		Huckabee	22%	(4)
Texas
primary	Clinton	51%	(65)		McCain	51%	(121)
	Obama	48%	(61)		Huckabee	38%	(16)
caucus	Obama	56%	(0)
	Clinton	44%	(0)

Here we go again!

It could be a late night tonight as Texas and Ohio are neck and neck on the Democratic side. Four states have primaries (/caucuses) today and here is the order in which the polls will close:

Vermont (15 delegates at stake) -- polls close at 7:00pm eastern time
Ohio (141 delegates are at stake) -- polls close at 7:30pm eastern time
Rhode Island (21 delegates are at stake) -- polls close at 9:00pm eastern time
Texas (193 delegates are at stake) -- all polls will be closed by 9:00pm eastern time. As soon as the polls close in an area, caucuses begin (126 delegates will ge allocated according to the primary results, 67 will be allocated according to the caucus results).

Vegas Odds

Well, the polls are all over the place and no one seems to have any idea what's going to happen on Tuesday in Texas, Ohio, Vermont and Rhode Island, so that can only mean that it's time to check in with the Vegas odds!

Candidate	Jan 22nd odds (after SC Reps before SC Dems)	Feb 3rd odds (Superbowl Sunday)	Feb 9th odds right before LA, WA, DC, MD, VA	March 2nd odds two days before TX, OH, VT, RI
Hillary Clinton	even	6/5	8/5	5/1
Barack Obama	5/2	5/2	6/5	even
John McCain	7/2	9/5	7/5	7/5
Mike Huckabee	25/1	100/1	100/1	500/1

Lewis Black: Leave Huck Alone!

The Next Day...

Here's the buzz in the aftermath of Wisconsin and Hawaii:

First, here are the raw numbers from Wisconsin:

John McCain defeated Mike Huckabee 219,652 to 147,742. Meanwhile Barack Obama defeated Hillary Clinton 635,693 to 444,604. Hillary got more votes than McCain and Huckabee combined! Or, as Miles pointed out, "[i]f he were running in the Democratic primary, McCain would have come in a distant third." WOW. The turnout was also massive in Hawaii.

Kirk Watson responds.

Hrrrmm... the the evidence is in. Barack Obama must be Jewish.

Oh, I wish I was making this up, but I'm not. The falafel-loving centerpiece of the Fox"News" lineup, Bill O'Reilly, has actually been talking about lynching Michelle Obama (update: more from devilstower).

Clinton has her own 527, and they're shifting in to high gear! See the first ad here!

Media strategist Mark McKinnon is currently advising McCain, but will he stay in his post if Obama is the nominee?

John McCain takes us back to the fun days of the Bob Dole campaign (read the speech!)! Also, McCain blames Obama for the fact that Bush is attacking Pakistan.

Bush's approval rating has reached a new low, at 19% (that's an historic low!). And you really do have to wonder what that 19% is thinking!

The Big Dog says Hillary will either be made or broken in Texas and Ohio.

Hillary for Majority Leader!

And, finally, where are the feminists? [update: here they are! (via HP)]

Sunday Roundup

Hillary Clinton: What's going on in the campaign? Where can one learn more about these dynamics? Is the press unfair to her? Are they biased?

Bill Clinton: He's baaack! Does he suck?

Barack Obama: Should he take the public money? McCain thinks he should, but he's about the only one. Maybe McCain's just jealous.

John McCain: Does he have any integrity? Can he control his temper?

Al Gore: is he still the dark horse? Or will he be a broker?

Texas: What is up with the crazy polling there?

New York City: Where are the votes? Who knows?

David Davis (R-TN 1st), is running for reelection to the US House and a blogger in our midst is (sorta) mounting a campaign to assure some opposition.

Charles Barkley is no longer a Republican.

Remember talking about campaign music? Here's more fodder for discussion (more artists have come forward to ask conservatives to stop using their music)!

I hate hearing about how stupid Americans are, but for some reason, I keep reading.

And finally, Lawrence King, our sad nation's latest hate crime victim, is remembered.

Three New Polls

As an update to yesterday's post about polling in pivotal upcoming states, here are three new polls of Texas voters that were released today:

Pollster	Dates	Clinton	Obama	Undecided	/	McCain	Huckabee	Paul	Undecided
Rasmussen Reports	Feb 14	54	38	9	/	45	37	7	11
American Research Group	Feb 13-14	42	48	7	/	42	36	11	9
Texas Credit Union League	Feb 11-13	49	41	8	/	45	41	6	5

VA, MD, DC!

Pour yourself a beverage and break out the steamers! We're spending the evening around the Chesapeake Bay!

	Democrat	Republican
Tuesday Feb 12	DC
	Obama 75% Clinton 24%	McCain 68% Huckabee 17%
	Maryland
	Obama 60% Clinton 37%	McCain 55% Huckabee 29%
	Virginia
	Obama 64% Clinton 35%	McCain 50% Huckabee 41%

UPDATE (7:00pm): WOW! Obama has already been projected the winner in Virginia! Sha-ZAM! That was the only state where Clinton was considered competitive...
UPDATE (7:50pm): Voting hours in Maryland have been extended an hour and a half because of bad weather. Polls that were about to close will now stay open until 9:30pm.
UPDATE (8:15pm): Obama is the projected winner in DC.
UPDATE (8:20pm): Clinton deputy campaign manager, Mike Henry, has resigned.
UPDATE (9:30pm): Obama is the projected winner in Maryland.
UPDATE (10:05pm): John McCain is speaking now. Clinton and Obama spoke earlier, and the contrast between Obama (who just finished moments ago) and McCain is incredible -- Barack and the 18,000 in his audience were so full of energy and John and his small gathering were quite listless by comparison. I am so hopeful that this will be the matchup in the fall!

Even while voters have been casting their ballots today, talk has turned to the March 4th contests in Ohio and Texas. The New York Times said today that they are "must-win" for Clinton. The Washington Post includes Pennsylvania in that category as well. I haven't seen any polling in those states yet, but the press is saying that Clinton is currently ahead in all three (though Pennsylvania doesn't have its primary until late April).

UPDATE (10:30pm): Pollster has just added Texas! Hopefully Ohio and Pennsylvania will follow presently!

What's next? On Tuesday, February 26th (two weeks from today), the Democrats debate on MSNBC. Between now and then are next Tuesday's primaries in Hawaii (dems) and Wisconsin. After the debate are contests in Ohio, Texas, Rhode Island and Vermont. Then March wraps up with visits to Wyoming (dems) and Mississippi. April will take us just to Pennsylvania, and then May's contests include Indiana, North Carolina, West Virginia (dems), Hawaii (reps), Kentucky, Oregon, Idaho (reps), South Dakota, Montana (dems), New Mexico (reps), and Nebraska (reps).

If we don't have a couple of candidates by then, we'll have to take it to the conventions! Fun, fun, fun!

Monday Tidbits

It's pretty quiet out there. Everyone's waiting for the big DC area races tomorrow. A few things are floating around, though:

Tom Lantos, the only Holocaust survivor to serve in Congress, has died after a short battle with cancer.

The meeting between John Edwards and Barack Obama that was supposed to happen today in North Carolina has been postponed. Apparently, there was a scheduling conflict (or maybe it's that the media attention was getting too intense).

Today's endorsements: Paul Weyrich for Huckabee and Gary Bauer for McCain.

Oh, and here's a person with a rich fantasy life!

LA, WA, NE, KS!

Obama and Huckabee had good nights! It must have been a day for underdogs. ;-D

UPDATE: Obama really hit it out of the park tonight (he's such a hope-monger!). He and Clinton spoke in Virginia at the Jefferson-Jackson Dinner. You can watch both speeches here.

	Democrat	Republican
Saturday Feb 9	Louisiana
	Obama 57% Clinton 36%	Huckabee 43% McCain 42% Romney 7% Paul 5%
	Washington
	Obama 68% Clinton 31%	McCain 26% Huckabee 24% Paul 21% Romney 16%
	Nebraska	Kansas
	Obama 68% Clinton 32%	Huckabee 60% McCain 24% Paul 11% Romney 3%

Bottom Line

There's been a lot of talk on the news about Huckabee insisting that he be the one to fill out McCain's now near-inevitable ticket. There's really no mathematical way for Huckabee to win the nomination (yeah, yeah -- I know, Huckabee didn't study math in school, he studied miracles. Hee-yuck!), so everyone is assuming he's in the race for the VP job. And given his roughly 60-40 showing in Kansas today (and he got all of the delegates), he might end up amassing enough power to throw his much-reduced weight around.

There's one fundamental problem with a McCain/Huckabee ticket: McCain is really old, and Huckabee is really crazy. So, there's a better than normal chance that this ticket could bring us that much-feared theocracy the right wing radicals have been wanting for decades.

Any sane people out there will see that (especially if we give them some help in the runup to the election!), and Huckabee will end up being a drag on what could be a very formidable McCain ticket.

So, enough talk about VP Huckabee. Any other ideas for a running mate? (Besides Lieberman -- Oy.)

Dobson endorses Huckabee

Gee, there's a surprise.

Coming Up...

Whew. Super Tuesday had a little something for each of the candidates. McCain collected his "front runner" statuette, Clinton defied the last-minute polling, Obama came out with the most delegates, Huckabee won some surprises in the South, Paul reminded people that he is still in this race, and Romney... well, Romney still has lots of money to spend. So on we go, and here's the rest of the schedule: